Suta reflects on a juicy summer, looks forward to a busy Autumn, talks about his joy of helping people to open and expand through the body, and reveals what Choose Bliss Now is really all about……
Come, come, yet again, come! August 15, 2010
Watch Suta’s video blog from the first Osho Leela Tantra Festival!
And some feedback from the event…….
The joy of Tantra June 22, 2010
Welcome to my Tantra-talking, sky-walking, heart-stroking, fire-stoking blog!
Much has happened in the weeks since the last instalment. I had the pleasure of going to work in Latvia for the first time. I followed an invitation from my friend Abhika to lead a group there in the capital city of Riga. I found it a most interesting place and was very impressed by the people who came to our workshop. The venue for the weekend was a very high quality, beautiful Ayurvedic spa recently opened by a delightful young couple, Laxmi and Krishna. For some of the participants this was their very first workshop of any kind and yet everyone really dived in, opened deeply and had a LOT of fun! This was my first time working ‘through’ a translator and I really enjoyed it – it gave a spacious, ‘breathing’ quality to presenting. I look forward to returning to Latvia next year.
Next stop was Croydon Hall to lead two six day groups with my beloved teacher, Sarita. The first week was the second run of the Tantra-Man Tantra-Woman experience (see my blog on the School of Awakening site – ‘The Evolution of Tantra Man’ for the story of its creation last year). This year we had a smaller group and a smaller team but the process has been refined, extended and improved so is now a powerful, alchemical journey.
We were blessed with perfect Summer weather which showed the grounds of Croydon Hall at their full glory. After a day together the men and women are separated for three days. I love this time of being with the men as they bond, share, and pass through many physical and energetic exercises that support the honouring and expansion of their sexuality, creativity, power and consciousness. Over the years I have noticed that men are really ‘coming on’ in their ability to connect with each other with honesty and heart and a greater willingness to embrace both their strength AND their vulnerability. It is a very touching experience for me to witness this and gives me hope for the journey we men need to embrace at this time in our evolution.
After resourcing with our own sex for some days the men and women are reunited in a beautiful and deep ritual. The last days of the group are given over to learning and practising two Tantric massages – the Taoist Sexual energy massage and the Shiva-Shakti Kashmiri Massage. Although very different, both these are powerful, intimate and supremely pleasurable sessions that go beyond mere healing and into the realms of Tantric transmission. Sarita emphasised the importance of the preceding days being a vital preparation for the massages. The energetic space and lineage from which they come must be respected, otherwise some of their potency is diluted and the magic is reduced to technique. So if you really want to get the full benefit of these sublime transmissions, experiencing them on the group is the best way.
After relishing a day off with a refreshing walk through the surrounding countryside, the next group started arriving for level 1 of the Couples Training. Partners came from all over the UK, India, Spain, Norway and the USA – even Australia (!) to be ‘in’ on Saritas last level 1 (from next year the first three levels of the training will be run by Roxana or Fiona, with different male teachers from the School).
As ever it is my privilege and joy to see couples taking the ‘rollercoaster ride’ through some of the difficult patterns that may have been causing some dissatisfaction or stagnation in their relating, and come into a greater depth of love and appreciation for themselves and their beloved. This time there were a few surprises – a number of people were clearly having Satori experiences – moments of enlightened perception and clarity ….. and, more down to earth, one couple managed to collapse their bed during one of their ‘love-appointments’ !!
We were also gifted with a live concert of beautiful music by Praful and Peru. Praful is a highly talented blower of saxophones and flutes whose music I have admired for some years. Peru is a more recent discovery for me and this was my first time seeing her live. My goddess! She is a force of Nature when singing – together their performance was an exquisite transmission with a strong Tantric flavour that complemented our group-work perfectly. Check out their CD ‘Breathing Love‘.
The group was truly a delight with most of the couples already expressing an intention to go ‘all the way’ to level 7 in 2012.
The Summer is a relatively quiet time for me in terms of leading events. I am looking forward to a six day silent retreat in July, followed immediately by DJ-ing/facilitating an experience of Ecstatic Dance at the Quest festival in Newton Abbot, before going on to Sheffield to run my favourite of my own groups, ‘Exploring Feeling Really, Really Good Through Tantra’. The highlight of the Summer is the Tantra festival at Osho Leela, a potent mix of the great and good of the Tantra world, which looks like it will be a very juicy event. I hope to see you there, or somewhere else on the travelling Tantric express!
With lots of love
Passion, ravishment and Tantra March 11, 2010
After a long, cold winter the days are finally becoming longer and lighter heralding the coming of Spring with its infusion of life-giving energies. This time of year can re-awaken our excitement for life, our desire to live and do things – some of you may already be feeling this to be very inspiring.
In life, in relationship, many people are longing to experience Passion. This is a dynamic, even intense sense of desire, enthusiasm, eagerness, lively positive interest that, when we feel it, can be FANTASTIC! It is like a tide of life-force that can empower and expand us to act with vigour and spontaneity, such that we surprise ourselves and others.
The poet Yeats wrote “A passion driven man sings out sentences that he never thought”. So this has been the muse for poets , the fuel for warriors and the bonding for lovers throughout the ages….. ……and yet how often we seem to settle for a life or relationship that is humdrum, bland or even tedious. Over time we can settle into patterns of behaviour and relating that are certainly comfortable and functional but rarely thrilling. When we are first getting to know someone there can be a strong desire which combined with the sense of newness, can make each meeting seem fresh and exciting.
In this first phase of relating passionate sex can seem to happen more easily. How come we allow our passion to fade? More importantly how might we ‘ignite that spark’ again? Well, as I always say – it begins with a choice – you look at your ability to be passionate in your daily life and perhaps consider how willing you are to become a passionate lover …someone who may be able to evoke that in another, and commited to making that last. I recommend that over the next week you take a few minutes to write a ‘passion statement’ every day. You answer a question like ‘Where do I find passion in my life? or ‘What made me passionate today’?
The teachings of Tantra remind us that energy can flow very powerfully between polarities, for example masculine and feminine. David Deida states in a very compelling way that many contemporary couples aim to create a kind of gender equality. This may mean the man becomes more caring and sensitive and the woman takes some of the decisions, or is the ‘breadwinner’. This is a healthy cultural development but it can tend to de-polarise the couple which would diminish the erotic charge between them. Thus in effect they suffer from becoming too balanced!
In my years of attending and leading Tantra groups I have heard the call from women that yes, they want men to be sensitive, listening and caring, but also there is a yearning for something wild or passionate from men. Many women are wanting to be ravished!!
They want demonstrations, from men, of feeling or being crazy with love and desire for them. This would convey an invigorating sense that you could ‘get carried away by the moment’ or ‘swept off your feet’.
This can be a sublime form of excitement – fiery , raw and vital! Men often claim they want a ‘hot’ or ‘passionate’ lover and yet they are not being that themselves. Many men become more animated and vocal watching sport than they do having sex!
What can we actually DO to open up the possibility for passionate meeting? As ever there must be some degree of willingness to at least play at this in our intimate moments. For the masculine partner to be more assertive, directional, even powerfully animalistic (whilst also remaining loving) whilst the feminine partner allows herself to surrender.
Although we usually think of passion as flourishing in spontaneity, in most relationships it also requires some degree of vulnerability and trust. So I invite you to consider the suggestion that a great way to increase sexual passion is to make time for that in your life.Actually schedule time for intimacy and /or pleasure. Pick dates, times and durations of ‘love appointments’. Be realistic, but also slightly challenging in what you plan. Then be aware that you may find all sorts of excuses to get in the way of actually showing up at the date. Keep the date anyway!
When you are first dating someone you are usually very excited and looking forward to the time together. You prepare accordingly. We shave, bathe, wash, wax and dress the body so that physically we look and feel special. We also mentally prepare with positive expectations and planning. This gives your partner and your own mind and physiology the message that this is a special,valuable and important occasion. Prepare for a love appointment in this way too.
Once in the date you give (and hopefully receive) focussed attention. You allow yourself to become fully absorbed in the moment. This is demonstrated through the presence in your eye contact, touch, listening. Use this time to enhance and deepen your connection – emotionally, spiritually, energetically as well as physically.
You can find new ways to enjoy physical contact. Surprise each other by sharing new visions and fantasies. Above all have an attitude of appreciation, even adoration for your partner …. and express that! As one of the Tantric scriptures says: “Where man and woman worship one another is the play of the divine”.
Yes go ahead and use words to tell them what it is you love and enjoy about them – you may compose or find some erotic prose or love poetry, or song or just say something simple but with heartfelt sincerity but also let yourself be spicy, naughty, outrageous!
To give you some more inspiration, I’ll leave you with this from Karen Karison:
“I love being lost in the sound that mud makes when it is soft and wet and begs your fingers to stay a little while longer, and please play some more in my earth. Smell this beautiful terafirma consuming you, begging you to forsake the skillful architecture of your hands to make a more marvelous mess, and I love you saying, ‘Look, I have found this branch of myself that I can use to dig your sweet red clay to death’ and I say ‘Yes, dig me baby. Dig me as if planting love like crocuses beneath the window of my hips.”
Tantra rising February 2, 2010
The snow and freezing temperatures of January already seem like a quickly receding memory, but some of the events of the time are still fresh in my mind…….
There is a groundswell of activity happening in the Tantra world, which will lead to it becoming more and more visible and increasingly widespread as time goes by. At the beginning of January, I attended for the first time the gathering of the ‘Tantra Union’. This is a meeting of many of the most well known, well established and respected teachers of Tantra in the UK. These two days gave me a chance to get to meet and meditate with and exper ience some of the flavour of different teachers work and, equally importantly, brainstorm ideas to raise the profile of Tantra. I especially enjoyed the company of these fine and talented people, and getting a renewed appreciation for the diversity of perspectives that come under the umbrella of ‘Tantra’.
Two weeks later I was at another Tantric gathering as the School of Awakening (meaning Sarita, and many of her most experienced teachers, apprentices and trainees) hosted a weekend, at Croydon Hall, for the media (there were two camera crews plus several print journalists, click here for the SoA blog). This included my first filmed interview and facilitating a day of Singles Tantra and a Couples day for the media to observe or participate in. My pubic hair finally made it onto film after years of trying!! See the handsome man Sarita is demonstrating the Chakra massage on to your left……
The event was considered a great success by all – to such a degree that some of the journalists were so deeply touched by the sacred and beautiful atmosphere that permeated the work that they wanted to book themselves onto a longer residential group!
One aspect of my work that I’m really beginning to enjoy (slightly to my own surprise) is giving talks and interviews – I gave my first Tantric massage talk in January, and am really look forward to doing that again on 9th February. As well as being filmed at the School of Awakening media weekend, I also gave my first radio interview this month! It will air on Sarah Scarlett-Williams’ Vivacity show at 12pm on 10th February, on Bristol Community Radio. Check out the start of my career as a radio star!! We’ll have the podcast available to download on our website shortly after the show.
As I write about all this media exposure and exciting future plans, I realise that I am part of a growing wave of practitioners and teachers who are feeling ready now to respond to the Call: the vision of practices and principles from Tantra starting to be more widely understood, more easily accessible and sought out by greater numbers of people of all ages and walks of life, as their life enriching value and benefit is generally recognised and appreciated. This means sharing the work with more passion, professionalism and integrity, and a willingness to explore new ways to describe what we do, so that an ever wider spectrum of people are getting exposed to this ancient wisdom that has so much to offer the modern world. So who knows – in a few short years we may be seeing Tantra much more frequently on the TV, radio and certainly the internet, maybe nightclubs/dance parties with Tantric themes or ambience, and Tantra classes becoming as common as yoga is today. You heard it here first!
Also in January, two more groups had the chance to experience ‘Feeling Really Really Good Through Tantra‘ – one at Osho Leela and one in London. This group process is really developing into a “delightful, fun, nourishing, stimulating, refreshing” structure. The people who come to participate are consistently describing experiences of great insight, profound yet simple joy, liberating spontaneity and delightful fun! I love running this workshop!! The next opportunity to experience this aspect of my work will be another residential weekend at Osho Leela from April 9-11, and in Bristol on 24/5 of the same month. See our calendar for all the details.
Love and blessings,
Magical, ecstatic wonder – Tantric life as I know it! December 2, 2009
Another month deeper into the season of dark nights (and days!). Since I last wrote there have been several noteworthy events in this Tantric life …… ……
I had the pleasure of returning to Croydon Hall with Sarita of the School of Awakening for a six day couples group that is level 2 of the three year training. This workshop explores the theme of ‘Male-female balance’ using the chakra system as the map or guide to the territory. Over the years I have come to appreciate the depth and profundity of the chakras as a way of understanding the way energy and consciousness manifest through the physical body and our behaviour, and also love many of the practical methods and techniques that we can draw upon to help bring us back to wholeness, health and vitality. So to spend six days immersed in this was something I had been really looking forward to. The group surpassed my hopes and was a delight. It was such a joy to see the couples deepening in their love ….and opening new dimensions in their erotic connection and expression with their beloved. Truly heartwarming stuff – and a testament that this Tantra stuff really works!! Oh and not forgetting the party – this was great fun with some wonderful characters emerging out of the dressing up and role play – proving that personal development doesn’t always have to be serious – in fact insight and learning can also happen with mirth and hilarity!
Back in Bristol the Men’s Tantra Circle has been continuing with the journey going deeper. There was also another highly enjoyable evening of ‘Tantra Touch’. I was very happy that my dear friend Tina was able to join me for the session and will be bringing her tremendous warmth, playful heart and general gorgeousness to these events in future as my assistant. I am thrilled to have her on board as she is such a wise, encouraging and loving being. Here in Bristol we were blessed that another radiant friend, Amala, had organised a high energy evening for friends and lovers of the spiritual teacher Osho. This included some sublime live music by the band Presence and Sarita acting as a focaliser for some seriously high-voltage energy. This was a very beautiful evening with many gathering from far and wide to dance and celebrate together. It seemed like we were being bathed in a pure, spiritual light that night and the ripples of this event could be felt around Bristol for several days afterwards! I would like to thank everyone who contributed to the magic.
Finally at the end of the month I was in London to hold another event with Sarita. This was a two day course called “the Ecstacy of Tantra”, organised by Alternatives. We had a great team of experienced helpers to support us on this workshop, and in all there were about 55 people , including many newcomers, taking a fast and deep journey. Again we were working with the chakras as the map to a journey that took us through many states – sexy, playful, dynamic, tender and magical. The group really opened up and dived right in, opening up a tangible feeling of ecstacy and wonder in a short space of time. I am noticing that people are really able to move through their limitations and let go of their stresses quickly these days, and reconnect with and remember our true nature. More and more people are exploring new ways, answering some calling……if you are reading this article its likely that you are too…..keep going , probing , exploring…. resting ….listening!
With love til next time,